Words, Mere Words • Eulogies

In Memory of Phil Deushane

1950 - 2001

Copyright © 2001

Words Spoken at his Memorial
Adapted for the written page and the passage of time

On March 21, 2001 I stared at a blank piece of paper, struggling to identify the proper words to place upon those empty sheets. The pages remained blank, refusing to accept the finality of the message that needed to be written.

Phil "Rags" Deushane, a Cal Club flagger for over 25 years, had died the day before, on 20 March 2001.

Some people have labeled me "The Eulogizer," so why was I stumbling then? Where were the words that needed to be said? I could state the obvious, of course--his dedication to racing, his service to Cal Club for almost thirty years, first as a flagger, then later as Divisional Administrator for F&C and most recently as a member of the Board of Governors. I could spew the obvious begats and begots: Phil was born in June 1950 in Alhambra, California. His father passed away when Phil was young. He is survived by his mom, Esther Bewkes, brother Larry, sisters Barbara Barnes and Diane Price, and several nephews including Rick Price, Tom Barnes, Trent McDonald, and Jeff Barnes.

According to my latest issue of The Toastmaster, "eulogy" means "good words." I have plenty of good words to share about Rags, but I'll try to keep it, if you'll pardon the expression, short.

It's funny how little you know about your racing friends, how insignificant "real life" seems when you're standing together at Turn 9 with Formula Fords pirouetting around you. For example, it was only after Phil's passing that I learned his age (50) and his education (attended college, but never earned a degree.) It was only while he lay dying in his hospital room that I met some of his family, his dear mother Esther and loving older sister Diane.

I knew his good friend Ricky, who was also Phil's nephew, only because Ricky was another valuable part of the flag team. But it was not until the somber ceremonies of his memorial service that I was privileged to meet some of Phil's other family members. It wasn't until his service that I met his special friends Martha and Lee and all of you, so many of you, who cared about Phil in life and honored him in death. Our presence there at that service, and in the park afterwards reinforced, I think, what the family had known for a very long time--Phil was an important part of our lives.

And so at last I come to share a couple of personal memories of Phil Deushane.

I'm fairly recent to the racing game. The first year I participated, 1988, I was invited to Phil's house for a Flag Team New Year's Eve party. I only knew a few of the flaggers in attendance there--the Hanelines; Roger McLenahan; Rick Cromwell; Tom Wilhite. Others I met for the first time at the house--Chip Parkhurst, whose Beetle sported a license plate reading "Flag Team"--and our host, Phil. It was just like him to welcome friends and strangers both into his home. His parties were so special that everyone just had to attend, even Jim Beach who was himself just a few weeks away from death by cancer.

A year later I still had not had a chance to work with Phil at any event. In June in Phoenix I flagged at a Formula 1 race and learned that Rags had returned to California the day before. He wouldn't support the event after one of Cal Club's finest women flaggers had been discriminated against by imported leadership. I still didn't know Phil very well, but I now knew he was a man of integrity who stood by his principles.

When at last I finally began working with Phil at the track, I discovered how much fun he could have on a corner while remaining stone solid where safety was concerned. Phil, a short fellow, had plenty of stature at a race track. His concentration and intensity while flagging was matched by his good humor and enthusiasm. When I was Flag Chief in the mid-90's, I knew that the best way to get new flaggers to come back to the track was to ask Phil to mentor the recruits, and so he did.

And he always had that twinkle in his eye.... when Earl Lebold and the Sports Renault Drivers Association loaned me Earl's race car for a weekend, Rags was working Turn 4 at Willow Springs. I was having a bit of problem hitting the apex so, on the cool-off lap, Phil stood at the edge of the track and pointed out the exact target I was supposed to hit.

The last time I saw Phil was in the hospital, but that's not the image that sticks in my mind.... Instead, I'll always remember him striding out to his corner, green backpack with the arm hanging out the back, his trademark beret ready for action. I'll see him dancing at our wedding, surrounded by lovely women and loving every minute of it. I'll hear him calling in his "done spinned and continued" calls, knowing full well he was pulling Marlene's string. Even on the landline you could hear the twinkle in his eyes! And I'll remember how much he enjoyed playing in the streets of Long Beach, and Del Mar, and San Diego, and even Los Angeles, mentoring new flaggers and renewing the enthusiasm of the old timers.

I didn't know Phil well, or for very long, but I consider myself lucky to have met him, flagged with him, and worked with him in the tower for as long as I did. I only wish we'd had more time to go racing together. He was a good man.

So long, Phil. It was a pleasure to know you.

(Page last updated: Sun, Sep 11 2005)